It took me several years of personal growth and cultural awareness to realize there are systemic barriers to eating disorder treatment. My battle with anorexia was painful and tumultuous, but access to therapeutic interventions made the healing journey feel possible. While I am immensely grateful for this, I also cannot brush aside the conspicuous reality that certain prohibitive eating disorder treatment barriers still exist.

Eating disorder treatment methods were conventionally built for patients like me—and that’s a serious problem. This harrowing mental illness can hook its claws into anyone, so we need to talk about eating disorder treatment barriers in order to make healing resources more accessible and inclusive for all types of sufferers out there.

Becoming Aware of Eating Disorder Treatment Barriers

When I entered the intake office of an eating disorder treatment facility in 2010, the admissions process began immediately. As a sick teenager, this felt too overwhelming to comprehend, but now, as an adult, I recognize that my illness was taken seriously because I resembled a common anorexic stereotype. I was visibly frail, gaunt, weak, and malnourished—not to mention White and privately insured through both of my parents. 

That privilege fast-tracked me into a secure therapeutic environment, which ultimately helped me recover. But others are not as fortunate due to archaic stigmas or harmful eating disorder treatment barriers. Not everyone has financial or logistical access to the resources and assistance I received almost 15 years ago, and this inequity can lead to severe consequences. 

The Need to Confront Eating Disorder Treatment Barriers

Eating disorders are some of the most fatal psychiatric conditions, but over 80 percent of those who suffer do so without any clinical intervention.¹ Members of marginalized communities are often the most vulnerable to eating disorder treatment barriers. To give just one example, youth of color in low-socioeconomic areas are less than two-thirds as likely to undergo treatment as their White peers. Even worse, many receive no diagnosis at all.² 

These illnesses do not discriminate—all races, ethnicities, genders, sexual orientations, body sizes, age brackets, and physical abilities can be susceptible to eating disorder behaviors. As such, healing measures must reflect the specific needs of these various demographics, whose unique stories and experiences intrinsically matter. When we talk about eating disorder treatment barriers in our wider mainstream society, we can then mobilize to start dismantling them.

Sources

1. Fitzsimmons-Craft, E., et al (2019). Adolescents and young adults engaged with pro-eating disorder social media: eating disorder and co-morbid psychopathology, health care utilization, treatment barriers, and opinions on harnessing technology for treatment. Eating and Weight Disorders, 25(6). https://doi.org/10.1007/s40519-019-00808-3
2. Moreno, R., et al (2023). Disparities in access to eating disorders treatment for publicly-insured youth and youth of color: a retrospective cohort study. Journal of Eating Disorders, 11(1). https://doi.org/10.1186/s40337-022-00730-7

Unfortunately, retail and service workers are often the target of verbal abuse. No one deserves to be called names, insulted, or threatened, especially while doing their job. Sadly, verbal abuse in retail and service professions is becoming more frequent in many restaurants and stores.

Have you ever been angry because a fast-food restaurant got your order wrong? Were you frustrated because you couldn't find a sales associate to help you with an item? It's perfectly natural to have these feelings when facing challenging circumstances. However, taking out your anger and frustration on the employee isn't the way to solve the problem. 

People in Retail and Service Professions Don't Deserve Verbal Abuse

Everyone makes mistakes during their lifetime. No one is perfect while performing their job. Sometimes, retail and service workers will get a food order wrong or cannot fulfill a request you need. Although not ideal, these situations don't allow you to resort to verbal abuse. 

More public places display posters stating that verbal abuse towards retail and service workers will not be tolerated. These posters remind people to monitor their reactions when dealing with others. These visual signs also help to reinforce any consequences the business may follow if one of its staff is the target of verbal abuse. 

When I worked in the food industry, there were no posters to tell our customers to be civil to the employees. I was the target of regular verbal abuse when an order was packaged wrong, the change was incorrect, or something else upset the customer. Some awful statements I've heard through the years included:

• "How hard is it to get my coffee right? You've gotta be stupid to forget the cream."
• "I didn't get the right change. Can't you count properly? Did you drop out of school?"
• "If you can't do your job properly, I need to talk to your manager."

There Is No Reason for Verbal Abuse Towards Retail and Service Professionals

The world has many job types, allowing everyone to explore different skills. One thing I've noticed working in the food service industry is how some customers view the job. I've been talked down to in some situations because the customers felt they were smarter than me. They didn't find it necessary to treat others courteously, regardless of their position. 

Thankfully, I had some terrific bosses who reinforced our value and worth to the business. Without the employees, these companies wouldn't be successful.

I regularly share my experience in the food industry with my family and friends. I want everyone to understand that the people who serve your coffee or work the cash registers at big box stores are human beings deserving of respect. They are not there for you to verbally abuse, even if there's a problem during your visit.

If we all take a moment to take a breath when something upsets us, we can help lessen the effects of verbal abuse on retail and service workers. 

Trigger warning: This post involves a frank discussion of suicidal thoughts.

One thing I’ve learned about having schizoaffective disorder is how to use coping skills for my symptoms. Some of the skills I’ve developed myself and some I’ve learned in therapy. Here are some of the coping skills I’ve learned for the symptoms of my schizoaffective disorder.

Coping with the Schizoaffective Symptom of Hearing Voices

Probably the most bothersome and pervasive symptom of my schizoaffective disorder was hearing voices, and I learned coping skills to calm them down. I say “was hearing voices” because I don’t hear them anymore, thanks to a change in my medication a few years ago. But when I did have this schizoaffective symptom, my coping “skill” was to chain smoke. Well, then, I quit smoking. I tried some other things, and I always took an as-needed antianxiety medication prescribed by my doctor. I would listen to relaxing music and go on Facebook. (In 2016, because of the election, Facebook became a nasty place and has remained so. I suspect it will turn nastier with this year’s election, so it’s a good thing I don’t hear voices anymore and don’t need it.) In 2016, another schizoaffective disorder coping skill I used was watching soothing movies to calm the voices.

I want to note here that when I got knee replacement surgery last year, the narcotic painkiller I took briefly made me hear voices again, but they were different. They weren’t as intrusive. They didn’t suck up my whole consciousness. They sounded like a radio or TV playing in another room instead of screaming at me and making me feel like my head was in a fog. Since I’m off the narcotic, I don’t hear them anymore. I don’t hear voices at all and hope they never come back.

Coping Skills for Schizoaffective Disorder and Suicidal Thoughts

I’ve learned coping skills for the schizoaffective symptom of having suicidal thoughts as well. I used to go to the emergency room, which is a perfectly good way of dealing with suicidal thoughts. But then I developed other coping skills for this symptom of schizoaffective disorder. The biggest breakthrough, which happened recently, was realizing that the suicidal thoughts were intrusive and that I didn’t want to act on them. I didn’t have a plan. Also, I’ve never actually tried to die by suicide. So, now when I have suicidal thoughts, I call my mom or my therapist, I give myself a time out, I take a bath or go for a walk if it’s nice out. (Remember, you should always reach out and talk to a professional about any suicidal thoughts you have.)

I encourage myself to live through the moment, and I remember that things will probably feel better in 10 minutes. Recently, I’ve been playing the piano. The last time I went to the emergency room for suicidal thoughts was a long time ago, a few months after the 2016 presidential election. Going to the emergency room is an excellent way to deal with suicidal thoughts, and who knows, I might end up in the emergency room again. That’s better than ending up dead.

So, those are some of my coping skills for schizoaffective disorder. What are yours? Please leave them in the comments.

If you feel that you may hurt yourself or someone else, call 9-1-1 immediately.

For more information on suicide, see our suicide information, resources, and support section. For additional mental health help, please see our mental health hotline numbers and referral information section.

When you are constantly anxious, it is hard to confront traumatic experiences and process your feelings from trauma. What can end up happening as a result is that you may avoid dealing with the situation. However, processing your feelings from trauma is critical.

For example, you might avoid talking about it with someone, so when it is brought up, you sidestep any discussion about it. Or, if you come into contact with a trigger, you try to find a way to avoid confronting it. Or, you might try, as best as you can, to avoid any thoughts associated with the experience.

Why It Is Important to Process Your Feelings from Trauma

Experiencing trauma can result in emotional dysregulation; in other words, difficulty regulating emotions like feeling sad, anxious, or angry.¹ As a result, emotional dysregulation may result in negative coping behaviors such as compulsive behaviors or engaging in high-risk activities. It can also create a pattern of difficulty in processing emotions, such as experiencing numbness to intense emotions or high levels of anxiety.

In my experience, I have seen the effects of intentionally suppressing emotions associated with trauma. I've found that the anxiety I experience can sometimes be lessened by processing emotions that are associated with trauma.

Sometimes, I would prefer not to think about them and even perhaps pretend that they didn't happen. However, the problem with that is that the impact of not processing trauma can lead to problems dispersed throughout your mental and physical health. For example, some symptoms that have been linked to stress associated with trauma include sleep disturbances, cardiovascular concerns, and neurological issues.¹

How to Cope with Anxiety and Process the Feelings from Trauma

I've found that traumatic events are difficult to put a finger on because they are inherently subjective. How we experience traumatic incidents depends on several different factors, and I've had to go through quite a bit of self-reflection to think about events that have impacted my anxiety.

Therapy helps process emotions associated with trauma and is helpful for embarking on a path to healing. I've found that therapy provides me with feelings of safety that allow me to be vulnerable when my inclination may be to avoid any emotions that cause discomfort.

Other helpful strategies I've found include journaling and practicing mindfulness meditation. Mindfulness meditation, in particular, seems to be quite helpful for me in calming the physiological symptoms I experience.

I think it is also important to remember that there is no specific timeline for processing feelings from trauma. This may take time, and I've found that self-awareness is a great place to start.

Below is a video in which I discuss the importance of processing emotions associated with traumatic experiences.

If having to process feelings from trauma is something you have experienced and dealt with, share the strategies you use to cope in the comments below.

Source

1. Treatment, C. F. S. A. (2014). Understanding the impact of trauma. Trauma-Informed Care in Behavioral Health Services - NCBI Bookshelf. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK207191/

Do you feel frustrated when people can't pronounce your name correctly? I can relate because my name is unique, and most people mispronounce it. Worse, instead of learning the correct pronunciation, they conveniently shorten or change it without my consent. If people can't pronounce your name correctly, read on to know how you can cope with the consequent distress.

What It Feels Like When No One Can Pronounce Your Name Correctly

Picture this scenario: you walk into a room full of strangers and personally introduce yourself to every individual. Most people struggle to get your name right the first time, and they ask you to repeat it a few times. You have no problem doing so because you get it: your name is hard to pronounce. What bothers you is when people throw up their hands, declare they give up, and decide that they are going to give you an "easier" name. 

The above scenario is something that happens to me frequently, and if you have a rare or ethnic name, chances are high that it happens to you as well. More than a lack of effort, the blatant disregard for my identity gets to me. Our names are a vital part of our identity, and someone not even trying to get them right signals that they don't respect us. As a result, I get annoyed when people can't pronounce my name correctly after I have corrected them multiple times. And I get angry with anyone entitled enough to give me a new name simply because they can't be bothered to learn my real name. 

Coping When People Can't Pronounce Your Name Correctly

It has and will keep happening, so we might as well learn to cope with people not being able to pronounce our names. Why, we should use it to our advantage. For example, as a form of self-respect and boundary setting, I filter out people who don't say my name right, even after multiple corrections. When I distance myself from individuals who don't bother to pronounce my name correctly, I prioritize those who value and respect me for who I am. 

Also, I often correct people who can't pronounce my name correctly, even when they haven't asked me to do so. By holding people accountable for saying my name correctly, I help promote cultural appreciation and sensitivity. After all, a name marks one's cultural identity and must be respected, no matter how unusual it sounds. It is hard to be assertive, especially in this regard, but it gets a little easier each time I do it. And if I, a shy introvert, can stand up for myself, so can you. 

Times get tough, and I'm not immune to wanting to shut the world out when it feels too loud, too heavy, or simply too much; that's when distraction and escapism come into play. Sometimes, a little mind vacation is needed. Just like physical vacations, it can be helpful to mentally check out momentarily to rest and reset. But as with most things in life, there is a balance, and tipping the scales can have harmful consequences.

What Is Distraction, and How Is It Used?

I'm throwing out the dictionary and sharing what distraction means to me: taking a mental break when overwhelmed. Sure, there are distractions, such as a text during a meeting or seeing a dog while driving, but I'm focusing on the practice of distraction to combat distress.

When I feel overstimulated, or my emotions run high, I heat up and get flustered. My fight-or-flight kicks in, and I'm not acting my best or making great decisions. Logic goes out the door, leaving only panic. Distraction is a great way to regain some mental control.

Visual, auditory, and social outlets can be great distraction tools. My preferred distraction is reading or taking walks. Others prefer comfort shows, calling a friend, or music — there are many things you can use to take a break from the anxiety and decompress.

What Is Escapism?

In my mind, escapism can look like a distraction, but looking closer, it's hurtful. Instead of using a task to check out and calm down momentarily, it's used to avoid the problem.

With distraction, the goal is to get back to a healthier mental spot to tackle a challenge. With escapism, the goal is not to have to face the challenge at all.

There are obvious escapism tactics, like drug or alcohol use, and there are ones that seem harmless, like hours of social media scrolling. There are even tactics that could be seen as "healthy," like incessantly working out. The point is that the task doesn't need to be sinister, but if it becomes a habit used to avoid difficult emotions, it's a problem.

Avoid Letting Distraction Become Escapism

There's no doubt that it feels good to slip away for a while, but the line between distraction and escapism can be easily crossed without noticing.

The difference is intention. "I'm going on a walk before answering this difficult email" is a lot different than "I don't want to think about it, so I'm going to open a bottle of wine and scroll my phone."

There's nothing wrong with a glass of wine and checking social media. There is something wrong with not wanting to face emotions. Getting into the habit of pushing off emotions creates a snowball effect. Those emotions don't go away, and they don't get easier later.

It feels nice to continuously stow away emotions for later — trust me, I've been there. But it's not healthy in the long run. Distraction is a tremendous tool to re-center and regain control, but it comes with intention and self-discipline. Learning the difference between when I was distracting and when I was escaping helped me put my recovery back on track.

I've found that nature provides greater self-esteem. Self-esteem is a delicate yet pivotal aspect of one's wellbeing, particularly for those navigating the challenges of mental health. In my personal journey, I have found that nature is a sanctuary that extends a comforting hand toward healing and heightened self-esteem. 

Nature's Impact on Self-Esteem

Where I live, I am fortunate enough to be able to regularly connect with nature. As I walk through serene natural landscapes, an inexplicable sense of tranquility washes over me. The sheer simplicity of nature serves as a reminder that I am part of something greater, a universe that welcomes me without judgment. This connection to the natural world becomes a cornerstone in rebuilding and elevating self-esteem.

One of the most compelling aspects of nature's impact on self-esteem lies in its ability to foster a sense of accomplishment. Whether conquering a challenging trail or finding peace beneath the shade of a tree, each step and every breath resonates with profound achievement. Nature celebrates effort and resilience, offering a haven where self-esteem is built upon the foundation of small victories. 

Moreover, nature provides a canvas for self-reflection and self-discovery. The stillness of a forest or the vastness of a mountain range creates the space for introspection, allowing me to confront and understand my thoughts and emotions. In this serene setting, I have found the courage to confront my insecurities and fears, gradually replacing self-doubt with self-acceptance. Nature becomes a mirror, reflecting not only the beauty of the external world but also the potential for growth and transformation within. 

Nature's Gift to Self-Esteem: Awe and Wonder

The inherent beauty of the natural world acts as a balm for the soul, cultivating a deep sense of awe and wonder. As I witness the vastness of the night sky filled with stars or marvel at the intricate design of a flower, my perspective shifts. Nature's grandeur serves as a powerful reminder of the inherent beauty within myself, eroding the negative narratives that often accompany mental health struggles. 

In my life, connecting with nature has been a transformative odyssey toward healing and bolstering self-esteem. The embrace of the outdoors provides a sanctuary for self-discovery, accomplishment, and reflection, offering solace to those of us grappling with mental health challenges. As I continue to forge this symbiotic relationship with nature, I find myself not only healed but also empowered, recognizing the resilient and beautiful spirit that resides within. Thanks to nature, self-esteem, once fragile, now stands fortified.

In today's video, I share some ideas for utilizing nature to boost your self-esteem. 

One of the toughest battles I have faced in my journey is the shame and stigma in recovery. For years, I carried the burden of shame, believing that my gambling addiction was a reflection of my moral failure. Society's misconceptions about gambling addiction only fueled these feelings, leaving me trapped in a cycle of self-blame and isolation. Society views gambling addiction as a matter of poor self-control. Most people still believe it is a choice and people can stop whenever they want, which is not the case. What shame and stigma in recovery do is disempower people and even hinder their ability to recognize addiction as a complex issue that requires support and treatment. 

Battling the Shame and Stigma in Recovery

Here are some strategies for those in gambling addiction recovery to battle stigma and shame.

• Take the time to educate yourself about gambling addiction's causes and effects. This will help you develop compassion for yourself and others facing similar challenges.
• Establish healthy boundaries with friends and family members who may inadvertently contribute to stigma through judgmental attitudes or lack of understanding. Talk about your needs and what support looks like for you.
• Surround yourself with people who understand and validate your experiences without judgment.
• Share your story.

Fighting Stigma and Shame in Recovery for Loved Ones

Here are some ways to fight shame and stigma in recovery if you're a loved one.

• Understanding gambling and gambling addiction can help you provide more meaningful support to your loved one.
• Approach your loved one with empathy and compassion rather than judgment or criticism. Remember that addiction is a complex and multifaceted issue, and your loved one needs understanding and support, not shame or blame.
• Create a safe space for your loved one to share their journey without feeling judged or dismissed. Practice active listening and refrain from offering unsolicited advice or trying to "fix" their problems.
• Encourage your loved one to seek professional help for their addiction. 

The Role of Gambler's Societies in Fighting Stigma and Shame in Recovery

There are several gambler's societies. Here's how they, too, can fight stigma and shame in recovery.

• Advocate for greater awareness and understanding of gambling addiction by challenging stereotypes and misconceptions like gambling is a choice or a phase.
• Advocate for increased access to better and cheaper treatment options for people struggling with gambling addiction.
• Support anti-stigma campaigns.
• Encourage responsible gambling practices.

Addressing the shame and stigma of problem gambling is essential in promoting successful recovery outcomes. Raising awareness and challenging misconceptions can create a more supportive and inclusive environment for all recovering gamblers.

Professionals can help you deal with, recover, and move away from verbal abuse with therapy. But is therapy the only way to heal from a verbally abusive relationship? With so many tools and resources available, some people may wonder if therapy after verbal abuse is the best route for them. 

You May Need More than Therapy After Verbal Abuse

I've had great results from using professional therapy during my verbal abuse recovery. However, there were many other things that I also incorporated into my daily life during my healing journey. I know I wouldn't be where I am today without seeking therapy, but it wasn't the only beneficial strategy for me. 

I have relied on several methods on my healing journey away from verbal abuse. These strategies included: 

• Talking to professional therapists
• Acknowledging the abuse and its harmful effects
• Learning to manage my emotions and reactions to triggers
• Setting boundaries
• Using self-compassion
• Prioritizing self-care
• Processing emotions in a healthy manner
• Using meditation and mindfulness
• Developing proper coping skills

In my experience, my therapist reinforced many of these methods and helped me use the necessary tools for healing. Although I understood concepts like self-care and mindfulness before, I wasn't actively using them in my life. 

I started incorporating these strategies daily as I became more comfortable with my therapist and myself. I'm confident I wouldn't have gotten as far as I have on my healing journey without therapists for verbal abuse guiding me with these tools. 

Therapy for Verbal Abuse Isn't a Solution for Everyone

Unfortunately, therapy isn't a one-size-fits-all solution for everyone. There are many different types of professional therapy. I've come across some therapists who wanted to help me, but their strategies didn't fit me well, leaving me unable to cope with some verbally abusive situations. I've changed therapists a few times over the years to find someone who's best suited to my needs. 

Therapy can be a costly way to heal from verbal abuse. Not everyone has access to medical and health benefits or a local professional therapist. These barriers can make it challenging to seek therapy to recover from verbal abuse. From transportation to budget restrictions, therapy may not be a viable option for some individuals. 

I would love to say that therapy for verbal abuse is an excellent way to heal. This strategy worked for me and continues to be a resourceful tool in my daily life. However, I'm sure many individuals can still successfully recover from verbal abuse without using a professional therapist. Each person's healing journey is unique. As long as you are seeking support and using healthy tools and resources, you can work toward verbal abuse recovery. 

Remember that there is no perfect way to heal from verbal abuse. How you manage your recovery journey is your own story. Don't let others tell you what you need to do to find closure and seek healthy relationships away from verbal abuse. 

Do you feel like something is missing in your life? You are not alone. From time to time, so do I. A recent session with my therapist revealed that this isn't new: humans have always been dissatisfied with their lives. She said we are only experiencing it more frequently today because of factors like social media comparison, increased capitalism, and the belief that one can have it all. These factors have come to define civilized life, and we cannot control most of them. However, we can control our reactions to them to minimize life dissatisfaction. Let's take a look at what my therapist told me about feeling something is missing. 

Why I Feel Something Is Missing in My Life

When I was younger, I often wondered why thoughts like "Is this all there is? There's gotta be more to life," came into my mind. It took me a fair amount of time to understand that depression was a leading cause of my chronic dissatisfaction with life. Only recently have I learned that feeling like something is missing in your life is also a trait that comes with the territory of being human. 

I think being dissatisfied is a common human experience for several reasons. In my case, it's the evolutionary cause, or as my therapist put it, "We are hardwired to want more to ensure survival."

She explained that this is why, after achieving a goal, instead of savoring it, I overlook it and quickly move on to something else. Current social norms also dictate that we should keep achieving big goals and brag about them online.

She told me that if you cannot be satisfied with what you have while working towards a better future, you will always feel like something is missing. Sure, depression will always be a cause. However, measures like blocking people who bother me and distancing myself from rigid societal expectations will significantly reduce the void in my life. 

How You Can Deal with the Feeling that Something Is Missing

It's okay if you don't know why you feel this way or what you need to make your life "complete." What matters most is knowing that you are experiencing a void in your life -- because you can deal with this feeling only after identifying it. Once you identify it, don't beat yourself up because it is only human to feel like something is missing in your life. 

If you are experiencing dissatisfaction frequently, consult a mental health professional to learn how to reduce its impact. Otherwise, the next time you feel like something is missing in your life, feel it, accept it, and move on.