day one

2/7/2009

there is no color bar or font choices.

i tried to use the mood journal and it kept asking for a sub mood and wouldn't save what i wrote where is the click thing for sub mood?

today i am anxious.  not enough hours in the day.

3 a.m. big keeps trying to go out so i slept with him in the spare room.  wonder if he is cold?  he slept under the down blanket.  i think he is just lonely and wants more attention but doesn't want to be in the cat room.  he wakes me up when he sleeps in there.

9 a.m. woke up and switched to the bedroom.  light sleep only.  brought michele down to go to the bathroom and then big wanted out and to go for a walk and so did the baby.  

10 a.m. took big for a walk down the street.  ran into the man from down the street who called me over to talk about big and told me he tried to come by at 7 a.m. but no one answered so he gave up.  i told him to call i will give him my phone number.  he says big is afraid of him, a surprise as big goes to that house all the time.  felt anxious talking because i know he will want to talk for a while and i am pressed for time.

11 a.m. got back and cleaned the spare room floor, fed the cats all of them, let the baby out, switched out the spare room carpet for a new piece and put the older one outside and cleaned and brushed it etc and then put it in the cat room.  went in the cat room to give out meds and realized it was too late to start that.  did their litter pans etc., 

12 p.m. made a hot bath, did a masque, switched out the bath rug.

12:30 ate brunch.

1:00   got dressed to leave.  time got away from me and left after 1:30 i don't know how or why, i felt very stressed.  i can only do real work up here as at home it is always too chaotic.  even an office at home wouldn't work because they would know i am there and wait at the door.  

1:45 actually got out the door and headed for my car.  i am fifteen minutes off schedule.  how did that happen, i thought i could get out by 1:20, 1:30 latest.  i get up here and b is here and he wants to talk, so i end up on the computer to destress.  which i shouldn't really do as i have real work to do.  then i go to the marina with a for an hour.  then k calls with an emergency and jf with one of his emergencies that are never emergencies except for his own yelling or nasty voice over absolutely NOTHING, he gives me an ulcer, and then two calls for rescue one is fixed up and the other needs more help on monday all of this i do for free and should be charging or getting funds because we have no funds and it freaks me out.  the stuff i make money at i keep putting off because it is more stress and i am trying to avoid stress.  i also need to think to do it and i can't with distractions and then deflating.  i need an office or something.  then i come on here to deflate, and instead i need to leave again to go take care of the animals and still no work is done and it freaks me out totally.  HELP!!!