My Life as an ADHD Sitcom

Hooboy! My ADHD Fuddy Duddy System™ failed me last weekend. Perhaps more correctly, I should say I failed my system. Good thing I know how to laugh at myself.

There I was. Bag ready, shoes on, heading out the door. I was even wearing pants. I was all set to go. I had also thought to set my wife's forgotten pocketbook by the door, so that I wouldn't forget it myself on my way out. I called a friend to let him know I was leaving, made sure I grabbed a warmer jacket for the brisk evening, backed out the door, and said goodbye to my friend. Then I used my trusty ADHD Fuddy Duddy System™ to pat myself down. Wallet? Check. iPhone? In my hand. Knife, pencil sharpener, and USB flash drive? Check. Keys? Um…

Keys?

Oh, dear. I left them in the other jacket. That would have been nice to remember BEFORE I locked myself out of my apartment. And car.

There I was. Bag ready, shoes and pants on, out the door, and standing in the cold like a doofus. I had every right to be ashamed, humiliated, and angry with myself.

Instead I laughed.

A quick call to my family procured me a ride out of my predicament, but the entire night had been thrown into disarray. Now I was making everyone late. My friends had already bought tickets for a movie and were headed to the theater. The quick family trip was now going to be a bit lengthier since I was waiting for a ride. The only way I could have made things worse was to have left the oven on.

Wait. Did I leave the oven on? No. Phew. I hadn't been cooking.

Considering how I had just written an article about how to avoid situations like this, I found the situation very ironically funny. I suppose not everyone in the same situation would think "Wait until they read about this," but I would have laughed anyway.

Once I arrived at my Mum and Dad's I made my apologies. I also offered to treat my friends to the movies since I had to cancel that on them. Then I began repairing the damage by being friendly, taking an interest in the people around me, and smiling as if everything was as right as rain. Eventually, I got (almost) everyone to laugh at my goof-up and the evening went on.

The shame about all of this is that I've had a terrific amount of practice apologizing and smoothing over ruffled feathers. Gladwell's 10,000 hours would find no better master than myself at apologizing. I'm just thankful that I learned to like myself and laugh these incidents off years ago instead of beating myself up over it as I used to do.

When our ADHD brains short circuit and glitch our daily lives with cock-up after cock-up, we have a tendency to develop very poor self-esteem. Not everyone is willing to forgive and laugh off our mistakes. Many people, in fact, take our behavior personally. I was once told by someone that being late meant I didn't respect the person who was waiting for me. If only they could ride around in my head for awhile and feel the angst being tardy gives me. I do respect people greatly and am often hotly embarrassed by my tardiness. But then I go and lock myself out of my home and car and find myself being late no matter how much I respect them.

Times like that I have learned to laugh. More often than not it helps others laugh at it too.