Don't Mean To Upset You

I hope my poetry doesn't upset anybody it's just how I feel and I wanted to share it with everyone hoping that you could relate. Besides cutting myself this is the only other way I know how to express myself. Most days I don't except myself and most days I feel people only except me out of pity. I don't know maybe it's true. Trying to love myself is like having sex for virginity, the love is never coming back or at least I don't think it is. I wake up everyday sad, mad, or depressed, not knowing who I am, only looking for that exceptance from others that I know I already have deep inside of myself, but can't find. Everyday is a struggle and every day that I stay on this earth I'm suffering. Shouts of pain inside me that I can't release and only will power enough to use a blade. Trying to find the real me on this circle path hoping that one day I'll find a path that will branch out even though I know I won't, but still I keep trying. Giving up and slowly dying. Cutting is like a flame and I can only see past the smoke. Somebody put it out please just put it out.